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Okay, 2023 is here and the “new year, new me” herd is stampeding their way to the gym and to the salad bar. If you’re in that crowd, we wish you the best of luck in your efforts.

Losing weight, saving money, getting organized, and fostering a better relationship with alcohol are all common goals people put on their lists in the new year. These are all amicable resolutions even if some of us know we’re just going to fall on our faces on a treadmill once and never put the gym in our GPS again.

So, what are some shortcuts you could take to meet your goals?

Losing Weight

You might jump on the scale and decide you need to drop 10-15 pounds this year. But, what if I told you that you could cut 200 pounds by lifting a pen and paper?

That’s a hefty amount of weight to drop, but your couch might be thankful if you get rid of that pesky spouse that won’t get off of it. Romance might be dead in your marriage, but you can revive romance in your life if you are able to cut the dead weight and shape yourself up to get back out there.

Saving Money

We just passed the holidays and, while Halloween was in October, there is no horror like opening up your credit card statement right now. Everyone wants to find a way to cut down on spending and add a little more to their savings account.

What if we told you you don’t have to buy for two anymore? If you cringe at the thought of doing anything for your spouse, it might be time to cut their budget to $0 and call a Texas divorce attorney. No more holiday gifts, no more birthday gifts, and, maybe most importantly, no more worrying about them using your credit card to rack up debt anymore.

Getting Organized

Do you feel uncomfortable in your own home? Sick of doing the dishes or picking up the dirty laundry that’s been sitting two inches away from the laundry basket for two weeks (seriously, who does that!?)?

You don’t have to pick up after someone who isn’t there. If the first, second, third, or sixtieth time asking your spouse to pick up after themselves doesn’t work, maybe ask them to pick up a pen and sign the divorce papers.

Having a Better Relationship with Alcohol

Whether you find yourself drinking to put up with your spouse or your spouse is constantly pestering you when you just want a glass of wine and your favorite tv show. Whatever alcohol-related challenges you’re facing at home right now could be fixed by permanently quieting the noise.

Okay, that sounded like murder and we’re 100% not endorsing that – we just mean getting that divorce you’ve been fantasizing about every time you fill your cup. We can cut out drinking if we have fewer frustrations around us. We can drink when we want and how we want when nobody is around to tell us what to do.

Starting a New Relationship

Maybe replacing your spouse is your goal in the new year. Getting back out there after a marriage can be scary, but let Attorney Dawn King be your first new relationship in 2023.

No, I don’t want to go on a romantic Arby’s date with you. I just want to be your legal support system as you go through your divorce this year. Contact my offices and get on track for all your biggest goals of 2023.

Also, if you already got your divorce but are looking for ways to improve your co-parenting situation – check out last month’s blog.

Ready for 2023? Okay, me neither, but it’s fast approaching and everyone is going to be in the gym or at the salad bar for the first two or three weeks for their resolutions. We wish you the best if you’re making that commitment and know you can do it, but we want to talk about New Year’s Resolutions you can’t afford to give up on after you fall off the treadmill once or realize kale has the texture of a book cover.

Parenting is a year-round journey, and improving your child’s circumstances should always be a priority. If you’re a co-parent, your custody battle wasn’t the conclusion of the conversation surrounding your rights as a custodial or noncustodial parent – if your circumstances improve notably or get significantly worse you may end up back to the drawing board on custody and visitation schedules. 

So, let’s get the year started on the right foot!

Take Care of Yourself

Okay, this might sound like an airplane oxygen mask instructional video but truly: take care of yourself before worrying about those around you. You won’t be the best parent you can be if you’re not the best person you can be. Consider making time for yourself for whatever self-care looks like for you.

For every moment you take for your kid you should consider taking one for yourself. Parenting is often about making sacrifices and just pushing through headaches, but it doesn’t have to be a nightmare.

Accept That You’re Never Going to Change Your Ex

You have your reasons for why your marriage didn’t work out. If you’re in a co-parenting situation with a difficult ex it’s probably time to realize they’re not going to change for you. Hell, if they didn’t change for you during your marriage why would they change for you today? (Maybe they’re even stuck in their narcissistic ways)

You don’t owe them your time or energy anymore. They don’t control you and it’s okay to look out for yourself. The court gave you your responsibilities as a co-parent. It’s important to fulfill those responsibilities and leave your ex in the dust in your own way. The better you and your circumstances are for your child the more likely you are to earn favor with the courts.

Be More Open With Communication

Look, everybody could use a little honesty now and then. We’re not talking about telling your spouse you need to leave the dinner table because lunch isn’t sitting well, but making 2023 a year where you’re open and honest about your wants and needs could make your marriage or co-parenting situation that much better.

For co-parents, if you can’t communicate with your ex without getting into a fight then maybe keep the communication short and sweet always. If you’re able to reopen that line of communication maybe this is the year you break through and create an amicable co-parenting relationship.

No relationship is perfect. If you’re a married couple you know that even if you don’t want to admit it. If you’re a divorced couple there’s a legal piece of paper that proves your relationship wasn’t perfect. I get it, and I want to be a part of bridging the gaps in your relationship so your children are put in a position to succeed in their formative years. Whether you need a mediator to help you work out a difficult co-parenting situation or are ready to make 2023 the year you walk away from that toxic relationship, schedule a meeting with me and get started on your new journey.

If your 2022 didn’t go as fast as everyone else’s then congratulations! Either way, everyone’s calendar shows just a few weeks left in the year – meaning there’s still time to check some important items off the to-do list before we roll into 2023.

Estate planning is a topic every adult, young or old, should be aware of and consider. Protecting what you’ve grown over time through hard work and sometimes just plain dumb luck (let’s just be honest here) should be a priority. We want to explore some estate planning benchmarks you should get to so you can set yourself up for success in the new year.

Start or Update Your Estate Plan

Okay, first off: if you don’t have an estate plan as an adult then it’s not too late. The best time would’ve been yesterday, but today is a new day and yesterday is old news. You should have a plan for what will happen to your assets, your money, and your kids when you’re gone. Your estate plan should also cover important decision-making powers such as guardianship or a power of attorney to establish who can make decisions when you’re unable to do so yourself.

If you already have an estate plan, then now could be a good time to take a look and make sure it’s still accomplishing your goals. Plans change all the time. For instance, I planned to eat a salad for lunch but then accidentally put my keys in my car and drove to Drew’s Place for some fried chicken instead. (It’s just so good!!) Your final estate plan will likely look nothing like your first estate plan, so let’s take a look at it today and enter 2023 with peace of mind.

There are many situations where updating your will may be necessary. Consider making this a priority if in 2022 you:

• Bought a house
• Got married or divorced
• Lost a loved one (especially if you lost someone who is a beneficiary)
• Acquired significant assets
• Welcomed a new member to the family through marriage or birth

Review Your Plan Periodically

The biggest advantage of an estate plan in place is being in control and setting out what you want to happen upon your death or incapacity. Situations arise and life happens. Is what you wanted then what you want now? Wills and Power of Attorneys need to be evaluated to keep them current. First of all, you obviously don’t want anyone who is no longer with us to be designated to receive your assets. Second of all, newborns may be added to your estate plan as beneficiaries, but a testamentary trust is needed to effectuate the transfer of your estate to a minor. Texas law prohibits minors from owning real property or inheriting assets so if you have minor children, you will need to designate a trustee to manage the estate until the child is old enough. Afterall, you’d hate to have that narcissistic ex you spent thousands of dollars trying to be free from managing your estate. 

Consider Roe v. Wade Impacts

Keeping your estate plan up to date is especially important for those in same-sex marriages with children. With laws changing and the Supreme Court raising questions about parentage, your estate plan should protect your child’s inheritance rights should something happen to you or your spouse.

There’s no more assuming you will have parental rights until you’ve legally established them. Your estate plan won’t establish parentage, but it can ensure there aren’t questions down the road about who will acquire your assets and can help establish who will care for your children when one or both of you are gone.

Update Your Beneficiaries 

As noted above, if you welcomed new members to your family or lost members of your family in 2022 then you should consider how that impacts your estate plan. Because a will may not affect certain assets such as retirement plans, financial accounts, and life insurance, you should also review and update any previously designated beneficiaries as needed. Having the wrong beneficiaries in place is a surefire way to cause headaches for your loved ones when you’re gone.

Attorney Dawn King can help you fulfill all your estate planning needs. Whether you need to start an estate plan, update the one you have, or simply review your plan, then schedule a consultation today.

It’s almost that time of year. You might have that crazy friend that’s been playing Christmas music since July, but we’re truly nearing the holiday season. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the New Year are right around the corner.

For families, this is a time to come together – in many cases letting bygones be bygones for the sake of everyone else. Of course, that’s a lot easier said than done for some because those bygones look a lot different in certain cases.

For co-parents, it’s important to make the most out of this time of year. Santa isn’t going to deliver the solutions down your chimney for you – but the courts will if you and your ex aren’t able to come to an agreement about who gets the kids during what holidays. We want to help spread some holiday cheer by helping you make the most out of this holiday season with your family.

Courts default to the standard possession schedule

First and foremost, if you and your ex aren’t able to meet in the middle (let’s be honest, that’s flat out impossible sometimes) then the courts will make the move for you. Under a “standard possession schedule” for the holidays, one parent will get all of Thanksgiving break and then each parent will split part of Christmas break.

This may be amicable for both parties and may not necessitate further discussions about your schedules. However, if one or both parents wants to make adjustments then it’s important to be flexible.

Flexibility is key

You knew your ex enough to have a child or multiple children with them. You may be aware of family traditions – both for your own family and your ex’s. If your family traditionally throws a large Thanksgiving celebration while your ex’s family prefers Christmas (or vice versa) then this may be a simple solution for everyone.

If one family doesn’t generally have many traditions but the other does then maybe being flexible with that schedule could be in the best interests of your children. You’ll still have time with them one way or the other, but the flexibility you give today should, ideally, be reciprocated in the future. Custody and visitation aren’t a game of keeping score, but the court will certainly note the behaviors of each parent.

Your kids care about memories, not dates

To be blunt, too many parents care way too much about dates on the calendar. We’re here to tell you it’s not that serious. Traditions are traditions, but the best interests of your child should always be kept in mind.

Your child’s best interests are likely more aligned with having two parents who aren’t constantly fighting over dates on the calendar. Years from now, our children will remember the memories made during the holidays and not the actual date that those memories were made. In fact, your child probably won’t mind having multiple Christmases and Thanksgivings (maybe just go light on the pie for second Thanksgiving, your kids aren’t Hobbits).

Bonus: odd holiday schedules tire the little ones

Running around and having a bunch of holiday celebrations tires us all out. The same is true for your kids. You might be able to get away with a little extra time napping on the couch or taking it easy with your kids if they’re on their second holiday celebration of the weekend.

We’d be lying to ourselves if we said we don’t all cherish the moments when things slow down and our kids aren’t a match away from setting the house on fire. When you work with Attorney Dawn King, you’ll always get the honest truth. If you need help getting ahead of the holiday schedule troubles with your co-parent or think your time with your kids is being neglected, set up a meeting with our team online.

I want to start this out by saying I’m a proud mom of three children with a full-time job. I could’ve probably just written that sentence as “I have two full-time jobs.” There’s a delicate balance every working parent knows they must find, and I want to help.

Frankly, failing to find this balance can put a serious strain on your marriage and ultimately result in you calling my office for advice. I don’t want this. As much as being a family law attorney means divorce cases help pay my bills, I’d rather Texas families strive at home. I can find something else to do with my time if couples suddenly figure it all out.

Be Flexible

None of this is meant to be idealistic. I fully understand s**t happens – so before we get into anything else it’s important to prepare for the unexpected. The perfect plan does not mean the perfect result.

When you have children, their needs will often trump your own. This could mean taking a long lunch to swing by their school to drop off the homework or lunch they forgot (yet AGAIN) or literally never sleeping because our kids just seem to know when we need the extra snooze time and something will come up. With three littles at home, I believe this is key. Someone is always sick or always has a last-minute appointment or need, and plans will be altered.

Set a Schedule

Okay, with all that said, it’s still important to try to have a plan as much as possible. This means making sure you and your partner understand each other’s work schedules and your children’s schedules. A schedule should consider things like how the kids get to and from school or daycare, extracurricular activities, and who is taking care of dinner, whether it’s drive-thru or those home-cooked meals that other moms seem to post on social media every day..

Cherish the days when you’re able to stick to your schedule (if those exist). Your schedule isn’t the bible so it’s okay to break the boundaries now and then, but if you and your partner are able to stick to it, I might have you write the advice article next time!

Set Boundaries

There are going to be times when you cannot break the mold of your day. It could be an important work meeting or trip or you just may be at your wit’s end and need space to breathe. Whatever the reason is, you should communicate it as best you can to your partner and your children.

I fully understand that kids don’t always (or ever?) respect our boundaries, so the best way to enforce these boundaries is to refuse to relent when necessary. This can mean locking yourself in your room or office or removing yourself from your home entirely. I often come home from a long day and just need some space, but I am immediately tackled by my children who have been waiting, not-so-patiently, for their mommy. I have learned to cherish this no matter how tired I am and ensure that I provide them with attention and meet their needs before I explain that Mommy needs a short break before bedtime. Remember, boundaries are our way of making sure our cup is full enough for the moments when our family needs us the most.

Make Time For Each Other

When you choose a life partner, it’s because you want a life of spending time with them. Having children with your partner or bringing a stepparent into the home is another commitment that takes time and consideration.

Children are going to get in the way of much of the quality time and intimacy we’ve come to expect in our daily lives. It’s important that your schedule includes time alone – just you and your partner. This comes with the setting boundaries part of this juggling act… but maybe don’t communicate with your children why you and your spouse need to lock them out of your room.

Know That Nobody Knows What They’re Doing

You might be thinking, “what a strange thing to say in the middle of an advice blog.” You’re not wrong, but I don’t want to sit here and act like I have all the answers. We all have pride in our own families and the work we’re putting in every day to make family life better, but there are no one-size-fits-all solutions to juggling work, children, and life in general.

There are going to be times when you need to break every rule in the book. There are going to be times when you are just wingin’ it out there. I want you to know: It’s okay, and you’re not alone. That’s part of being a parent. Sometimes you might even find a little fun in the madness.

At the end of the day, I understand that this can all be overwhelming. If you’re unable to continue with where things are now, and your marriage just isn’t working, give me a call. I bring personal attention and honest advice to every case I take on. You might just need a little direction and reassurance to make things right.

We know these blogs often lead with some humor and have some jabs here and there, but we also understand this has been a tough time for many Americans. The Supreme Court recently struck down Roe v. Wade, ending nearly 50 years of precedent originally set by the court.

The main focus in the aftermath of the decision has been on abortion rights. This is justifiable and understandable, but there are ripple effects that may go far beyond what’s at the forefront of these conversations. There are levels to the impact this decision will have both immediate and long-term on same-sex couples.

Establishing Parentage

One of the immediate impacts of this ruling is how it impacts the parenting rights of same-sex couples. This particularly exposes parents who decided to have a child or children outside of an assisted reproduction clinic, but partners that have used in vitro fertilization (IVF) or Intrauterine insemination (IUI) for the birth of their child are also in danger of their partner (or even the partner’s family, should the unexpected occur) claiming the non-biological parent does not have any legal standing to the child.

This abusive practice could cost some parents all of the rights and duties granted to parents, including visitation. This means same-sex parents need to ensure that their parental rights are secure and their children are protected from such claims. The best way to do this is to go through a legal second-parent adoption. This will establish the parental rights of both parents and prevent any such claims in the future  and will protect both parents upon the death of a spouse. We can help you with this process, so if you need to legally adopt your child give us a call. We can also offer estate planning to help ensure all of our client’s are prepared in the case of their death or incapacitation. 

Overturning Other Precedents

Within the lengthy text of the decision, Justice Clarence Thomas says the court “should consider” other precedents previously set – including Obergefell v. Hodges which established the right to marriage for same-sex couples across the United States, and Lawrence v. Texas which prevented laws that violated same-sex couples right to privacy and consensual sex. Justice Thomas’s statement lead me believe that it’s only a matter of time before the courts go after these decisions, no matter what reassurances are being given from the Court right now. 

On both fronts, same-sex couples need to consider what home life, finances, parentage, and other issues will look down the line. You may share each other’s insurance because you’re married which may be disallowed in the future if your marriage is no longer legal.

Another risk if Obergefell v. Hodges is overturned stems from a potential separation in the future. Texas is a community property state which means any items acquired during your marriage are considered the property of both spouses. If your marriage is no longer “active” then the window of your marriage becomes murky. If there are disputes over property and you need to go to the courts to secure assets this may impact who gets what.

Contact Attorney Dawn King

The best time to take steps to protect yourself and your family is today. You should immediately get on the line with Attorney Dawn King who can walk you through what this decision means for you and your family legally and help you complete a second-parent adoption and obtain the estate planning needed to protect your family. Contact us today.

When you’re going through a divorce, it’s important to manage expectations and know what each step in the process looks like. After all, the last time someone failed to meet your expectations you found a family law attorney’s blog online and now you’re reading this article.

Filing for divorce is as clear a sign as any that you’re ready to distance yourself from your significant other. Unfortunately, some spouses just don’t get it and won’t give you the space you need. In most cases, there’s an immediate need to address issues such as finances, custody, support, and even reduce the risk of harm during a divorce. A temporary hearing could be exactly what you need to protect yourself, get everything in order, and maintain a status quo as you proceed with the divorce. We want to help you understand what temporary orders do and what you can expect at your hearing.

Filing for a hearing

Before we get into which issues will be covered during the hearing, it’s important to know how to request a hearing in the first place. You will need to request the hearing in your petition and define what orders you’re requesting the Court issue. In some circumstances, you may be required to submit a supporting affidavit.  After you’ve filed a petition to the court, the petition and any orders or hearing requests will need to be personally served to your spouse. An attorney can help you through the filing and service process.

Most courts also require both parties to appear at the temporary hearing with a list of monthly expenses, tax returns, and recent pay stubs. You should gather this information early.

Temporary restraining orders

Most people hear the term “restraining order” and panic. A temporary restraining order IS NOT a protective order. I like to think of the Temporary Restraining Order as “30+ Don’t be a Jerk Rules.” The purpose of a Temporary Restraining Order is to maintain the status quo, and the restraining order will prohibit the other party from making jerk moves like wiping out bank accounts, excluding you from your house and vehicle, or selling your personal property. If you have children, the order will also include prohibitions against withdrawing the children from their school/daycare, hiding the child from the other party, and disparaging the other parent to the child. A temporary hearing will be set within 14 days of the Court issuing a temporary restraining order.

Many counties already have automatic standing orders in cases involving divorce or child matters that reflect the injunctions contained in a standard temporary restraining order, and the standing orders are issued and attached to the initial filing. In these counties, it may take longer to get a temporary hearing set.

Temporary financial support

Another purpose of a temporary hearing is to decide how the household bills and expenses will be paid while the divorce is pending, and the court could issue temporary support payments be made to a spouse. If you sacrificed your professional career to run the house or care for your children, you probably won’t have steady income immediately, and you shouldn’t suddenly be expected to pull money out of thin air to support yourself. Instead, you can file a motion to the court to ask that your spouse be ordered to pay the bills and/or make temporary support payments. 

This isn’t about sticking it to your (soon to be) ex for what you’ve gone through as much as it is about providing financial stability as the divorce process plays out. Remember, the Courts try to maintain the status quo, and the goal is to ensure that the marital estate remains intact until the divorce is made final.  The court will also consider which spouse is entitled to live in the family home and keep possession of any shared vehicles at this time. 

Most people don’t have the resources and can’t afford to wait until the divorce is finalized to be taken care of. This is why it’s almost always necessary to address the payment of immediate needs such as housing, food, and transportation. Each party’s prior financial contributions to the household and the ability to provide for the monthly expenses will be important in determining whether additional support is needed or not.

Child custody

In an ideal world, families would stay happy and healthy together. Unfortunately, we don’t always live in an ideal world.  When you go to a temporary orders hearing when there are children involved, the court will sort out the immediate custodial rights and duties of each parent. This includes, in most cases, naming the parents as joint managing conservators and designating which parent has the right to make important medical, psychological, and educational decisions, designate the child’s primary residence, and who will receive child support. The party who is granted these rights is commonly referred to as the parent who has “Primary”, but it’s important to keep in mind that the orders issued at the temporary hearing are meant to provide the child with stability and won’t necessarily be the final orders.

It’s a common misconception that the courts always favor mothers, but Texas law specifically prohibit the courts from discriminating based on sex and gender when determining which parent has “Primary.” The Court must always find that orders are in the best interest of the child, and a temporary hearing may be needed to allow the Court to examine the evidence to decide which parent will provide the children with a more safe, stable, and happy environment while the case is pending. You should be prepared to showcase why you’re the right parent for primary conservatorship not only long-term but also during your divorce.

Work with your attorney

You’re more than welcome to try to go through this process on your own. Texas has resources available for couples to file for divorce on their own. However, if you’re dealing with a particularly difficult spouse or have a lot of ground to cover to finalize your divorce, you should work with an attorney.

Attorney Dawn King will always give your case personal attention and provide you with honest advice. If you’re ready to get powerful results, contact us today and we will take on your spouse together.